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1. P10

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Session #90 – January 17, 1987
Gloria’s Circle

Present: Clista McPherson, Eileen Horton, Ida Nevala, Jean Chisholm, Jeneeka,
Owen and Maxine Cramer, Peggy Muldoon, Sidney Smither and
Shira Subotnick

Following a potluck dinner the Law of Relinquishment was reviewed by Myra. Shira was
welcomed as a guest sponsored by Jean as a possible member of the circle. Session began
after the meditation taken from Session #79

Sheariam: Good evening students and friends.
Owen: Should we sing our greeting? (Yes.) (“I am” “individual’s name” sung in
unison three times. Rather discordant at first try.) (You are doing very beautifully. We
are pleased that your circle is expanding. We welcome newcomers.
So it has been some time for you since last we met.)
Myra: November 15th, wasn’t it? (In that time, have you given thought to who
you are and what you are about?)

Myra: I have. I feel I’ve grown an awful lot in practicing what our purpose is.

Sheariam: And how did you enter your New Year?
Owen: Well, a lot of us entered the New Year starting just early in the morning of
the last day of the last year, participating in a world-wide meditation for peace. (As did
we.)
Myra: Could you give us a comment as to your response to it? (As is the case in
human endeavor, the groups were too large, which caused diffusion of the energy,
lack of attention to the purpose for which attendance was made. Again, may I
reiterate: small groups are more powerful than large groups. United effort is indeed
effective, but the more divergent energy systems present in one place, the more
inclination human nature has for becoming unfocused. In some instances there was,
indeed, disruptive influences which negatively affected the overall outcome of the
effort. (Sheariam was enunciating carefully and distinctly.)

Myra: Are you referring to the circles that met all around the world? Were these
negative problems happening in Portland? Or were they in other places as well?
(Throughout your globe. Human nature is the same wherever you find it.)
Jenika: When you say “large groups”, Sheariam, are you referring to the group at
the King Dome in Seattle Washington – a group as large as that? (7,000 people.) (That is
a “for instance”. But even smaller groups such as 30 or even 20. When small, petty
responses to human effort interfere with the focus, dislike of a perfume, annoyance
at another taller, all the little human annoyances that cause diversion. A small
group of truly united parts, five or six, can be more powerful than five or six
thousand. In Quantifying Quality, it is not greatness of number but degree of purity
and intensity of focus.)
Myra: It makes me glad we had the small group in our chapel.
Sidney: If you have five people only, doing it in the entire world, that would not be
as powerful as five million doing it in groups of five, though, I take it. (That is true.)
Myra: And those individuals who have committed themselves to continuing this
meditation on the last day of each month will probably be the smaller and more dedicated
few. (Correct.) So there may be a lot of power in continuing that kind of visualization.
Jenika: But all in all, Sheariam, was it a plus for peace? (Yes. No effort is ever
lost. Rarely is positive effort completely cancelled out by negativity.)

Owen: There is another movement called “Peace on the 21st” that has been going
for at least a couple of years that I know of. Do you know anything about that movement?
Is that being effective also? Although they’re not synchronous with everybody meditating
at the same time? (Any effort, no matter how minute. Your individual efforts in your
daily meditations and prayers, all go to accomplish the common goal. It is that
desire which is a good entry into our lesson for tonight.)

Sheariam: We have discussed the Rod of Life, enlivening of matter, the creation
of environments, the interaction of the Creator with the Created, which brings
Knowledge, accumulates experience. In that interaction, Desire is born, either for
more of the same experience or for greater experience. As Knowledge is
accumulated, cells of memory become available, ultimately resulting in what you
commonly think of as “thinking”. This is our topic tonight.
Thinking is not thought. Thinking is a mental process which, indeed, you
carry forward with your Mental Bodies, with your connection from the Vital Body
through the Creative and Mental Bodies. This is the kind of thinking that you
normally occupy yourselves with. This is not “thought”. This is Mental Process,
automatic, repetitive, mostly uncreative.
Just because, as self-conscious creatures, you can remember what passed
through your consciousness a moment ago, yesterday, last year, does not make it
true thought. Very often you do not predicate a true future upon those memories.
You accept a consequence because that is what you have experienced before. At any
moment of your day, should someone speak to you requesting to know what you are
thinking, you would at that moment respond most likely with a phrase indicating
that you were not thinking. Usually those words might mean that what was passing
through your mind was of little consequence. You would be correct. Most of your
Mental Processes are waste. They are at that Desire-Instinctual level. You little
realize that you predicate the next moment’s activity upon those Instinctual Mental
Processes rather than upon truly creative Thought.
On your Wheel of Karma, Purpose, Will, Motivation, come after Desire and
Instinct are established. Still you have not reached the level of Thought. Has it ever
occurred to you that the quality of your Mental Processes were definitely below
par? How much effort, how much attention, do you give to the quality of the matters
which occupy your attention? Would you consider worry as thought? (No.) Correct.
It is not.
Let us return to the Nine Components of the Divine Germ Cell.
“Consciousness” What does that mean? (Awareness.) In human condition, yes.)
Myra: But in the Divine Germ Cell, Thought is made up of Consciousness and
Volition. (That is correct. There is not Thought in the Divine Germ Cell. Thought is
potential. And “Volition”. What is Volition? (Is that the “urge to be”? (Not in the
Divine Germ Cell.) Myra: The “will to act?” (The capacity to have Will. If it were not
for the component Volition, there could be no Will. That Component is the carrier
of Divine Will. As you Quantify your Quality, you increase the ratio of Volition to
Consciousness and move toward true Thought. (Unintelligible question.) This has
been given before. What passes for Thought in your daily routine is at that level of
Desire and Instinct which limits the amount of Volition you exercise. You are
creatures of habit. Your thought processes are sponsored by emotional responses to
stimuli.
In your interaction with the Environment which you have created, Desire
becomes stimulated, Emotion responds, and the Vital Body reaches to the Mental
Body for a Thought Process. “How do I get this?” “How do I do this?” Desire says
first you do not usually consciously think “Body stand. Move to water. Prepare to
drink.” You have automatic responses which carry you through your day. You
depend upon those and rightfully so. If it were not for this instinctual level of
Thought Process, your material vehicle could not sustain your activities.
But are you satisfied to remain at that level of function? What is the first Key
to Cosmic Consciousness? (Aspiration.) Indeed. If you remain at Desire-Instinctual
level, shall you ever exercise options? Will you ever realize that your destiny is to
walk with God?
Do you see now why Purpose and Will and Motivation follow and not
precede Desire and Instinct? Each step of the Karmic Wheel is progressive. At this
point in the development of your earthly life, most of you have been through that
wheel many times. If you would get off that eternal wheel, moving into your ultimate
designed destiny, you must move toward Creative Thought, not mere Mental
Process.
Now, in the intervening time until we meet again, I ask you to pay attention
to that which occupies your thought processes. What do you think about most of the
time? Where is your consciousness? Is that conducive to Quantifying your Quality?
Are you increasing your Volition? As you make these self-observations, take note of
which thought processes bring you the greatest sense of joy.
And now I would ask you, are there any of you who are still practicing
earlier assignments?

Jenika: The well meditation. (Go on.) Do you want me to describe where I’m at
with my well meditation? (Please do.) I am the one who was in the tower. I’m still in the
tower when I start my meditation, but it’s taller than it was. I had a young girl with me
before, and she has since faded and disappeared, pretty much. When I look out the tower,
out the place where a window is, there is a tree. The tower is very tall, a block, maybe.
The tree is just as tall. I look out and it is sunny out and birds are singing in the tree. So I
say, “I am going to the well.” So instead of walking down the stairs, it’s too long, I climb
out the window, and I float down, which is very nice. On the way down I see all kinds of
families of birds twittering away – little babies in nests, mothers and fathers feeding
them, very happy scene. I float down watching the scene. When I get to the ground, I
start up the path toward my well. On my left, as always, comes the dark knight on a dark
horse. A lot of times he hits me on the way charging by. If I don’t get out of the way fast
enough, I get hit. But it’s OK. I know it’s not going to last for long, so I just get up and
keep going to the well.
So I get to the well. It’s on a little incline. To the left of the well, standing right
next to the well is Joshua in the monk’s robe. He says he is more of a teacher than a
guide. To the left of him was a monk who turned away from me for a long time. Finally
he has turned toward me, and I think his name is William or Will. To the right of the well
is who I have identified as Carolyn the Guide, Chantell the Guide, and Belfrey, who is
my healing Guide, a tall blonde man.
What’s happening is that William, or Will, is taking my hand, and we go to the
left. We sit down on the hillside. We just sit, and we don’t say anything. Sometimes when
we’re sitting there, I get the feeling that my life is very petty. I’m looking out on valleys
and hills and mountains, and I think, “What am I doing with my life? I’m not doing
enough. It’s inconsequential.”
This morning when I meditated, basically the same thing happened. I went to the
well, and I asked Joshua, “Joshua, why don’t you ever talk to me? You never talk to me.”
And he said to me, “Well, do you notice that every time that you come to the well, you
don’t stop to take a drink? All you do is look around and see who is going to talk to you,
who is going to tell you something.” He said, “I have to stop you and have you take a
drink. You need to take more initiative and do more, instead of waiting for it to come to
you, thinking that you can get it through reading. You have to work. You have to extend
yourself.” When I do take a drink of water, there are still the crushed gem stones and the
little flickers of light. Sometimes I drink them.
I would like to know your comments, especially on the tree, the special llama,
why my tower is getting taller, and any other comments you can give me to clarify it for
me.

Sheariam: You are doing excellently. As your tower rises, it is your way of
imaging to yourself that the structures of your life are becoming devoted to higher
goals. That awareness that you have of pettiness and of inconsequentiality of your
life is the balancing factor. You could become lost in that rising tower, if it were not
for William, who is teaching you the value of personal will. It is not accidental that
his name is William.
And Joshua is correct in telling you that you do not take into yourself enough
of your life. You remain outside. You watch and wonder. You need to participate
more personally, even though it may seem to be inconsequential. There is no
experience in life totally inconsequential. It may seem so at the time in comparison
to what may appear to be happening in other areas of your life and with the lives of
others about you.
The tree is your anchor to earth. You have a tendency to be flighty, to want
to be diaphanous. It is well and good that life flows through you, but not without
direction. And your capacity to direct life requires a certain amount of channeling.
If you are too transparent, too open, then it is like the waters rushing through a
sieve rather than through a funnel. As you channel life into purposeful directions,
you have that experience which enables you then to move to mastery. Do you
understand?
Jenika: Yes, I do. Is that why William’s name is Will? (Yes.) That’s what I need,
to control my will and have more mastery over my life. (Yes.) Good. Thank you very
much.

Sheariam: It might be well for all of you to once again do the Stairs Exercise (See
Session #7), for it will give you some criteria by which to judge your progress, most
especially those of you who have had interpretations of your first experiences with
the stairs, and those of you who have not had the opportunity for interpretation.
Either myself or Silverthistle will be with you to assist.

Jean: Sheariam, I had a dream which I don’t quite get the meaning of, a short
one. I dreamt I was taking care of a baby, and my attention was diverted just for a
moment. Where is my baby? The baby was head down in the toilet and almost drowned. I
grabbed her out. She was limp in my arms. I gave her artificial respiration, squeezed the
water out, and she came back to life. I was very happy, but I felt very bad that my
attention had been diverted, and that I had allowed that to happen. I was happy, though,
that I had cleaned the toilet and it was just water that she had gone into. I don’t know
whether it was a boy or girl. I keep saying “she”.

Sheariam: Yes, “she” -- a receptive infantile part of yourself As one studies these
esoteric matters, it is not unusual to develop the opinion that one’s baser, less
evolved instinctual drives, if you will, must be abandoned, not paid attention to. For
you in earth, this is disaster. You must nurture, care for, protect, and encourage to
grow that base instinctual part of yourself, for that is the outlet for Creativity in the
earth physical. It is that center which sponsors passion, desire, creativity. In certain
cycles of your life, it allows you to produce children of the heart, children of the
mind. It must never be renounced so long as you are in the earth life. All of you
must function. So you have part of you telling you to recapture, to bring back to life,
to save, that part of you. It is not to be relinquished, renounced, rejected, so long as
you live in this material Quality, you are to enjoy the sensuality of that body, from
the creative point of view, not mere self-indulgence. Do you understand that?

Jean: I think I do.
Myra: So would that apply to all of us? (Yes, indeed. One should not renounce,
relinquish, or reject sexual activity because of age or because of some spiritual
aspiration. You need your sex drive to bring forth poetry, to perform, to dramatize,
to make music, to be joyful.)

Sidney: Does that sex drive also contribute to scientific and philosophical
endeavors?( Of course.)
Jenika: But you can do all these things without sex, or without a sex drive. (Not
without sex drive, but without sexual intercourse. To repress that creative energy is
to deny your birthright. Sex is expressed in many ways, not merely in intercourse.
(Request for examples.) Music, dance, painting, writing.)
Myra: And joyous interaction with other people. (Exactly.)
Maxine: Well that seems to me to just be living. It’s the same as living, isn’t it?
(That is living. Most people do not. It is that same drive which wages war and kills.)
Myra: In other words, it is a very powerful energy which can manifest in many
ways.

Sheariam: It is the most powerful energy of your materiality. It is the
Desire/Instinct level of the Karmic Wheel. You laughingly say, “He thinks with his
gonads.” You do. You should.)
Jean: If you hadn’t explained it, that would have been so obscure that I could
never have gotten that interpretation from the dream. It makes sense with the feeling that
I had. (And what are the Attributes you are trying to develop under the Law of
Dominance? (Emotion and Desire.)
Jean: And I felt lots of emotion – guilt, a sense of how could I have done it?
And when I had the baby alive again, I felt great joy, and I was astounded that I had
turned my attention. I thought, “How could I have done that when the baby was so
important?”

Sidney: I guess it was the same night that Jean and I had similar dreams, only I
envisioned myself as about a three-year-old boy. I was being drawn towards that toilet,
and my head was slowly going down. I don’t know if my head was in the water, but I
used my arms and powerfully pushed myself away from the toilet. I assume that has
somewhat of a similar significance, but is there anything additional that you could expand
on?

Sheariam: A phenomenon which we have not yet discussed, as we have not yet
reached that area of our discourse, is the sharing of images by two or more
individuals. This is why it is so imperative that you understand the difference
between Mental Process and true Thought, and the fact that your Mental Processes
are conducted for you through the Vital Body, the Creative Body, and the Mental
Body.
Thinking, the process of Thinking, occurs in the Mental Body which you all
share in common, but is in certain ways restricted. Each individual human being
does not have total access to all of the Mental Body, but certain parts of it which are
shared by other individuals who are incarnationally connected.
Again we exceed the boundaries of your instructions. You do not yet have
that foundation. In this instance, you were experiencing another’s dream, but
because you are not that other person, you dealt with the situation from your own
Desire Body and its Instinctual drives. You did not await a rescue. You saved
yourself. Much of your experience will become clearer as we complete our discourse
on the laws or rules governing Incarnation and Reincarnation.
Those of you who were with this group in the very early days may recall the
discussions of Karma, and how little you could understand of what was being said.
How much better you are now prepared to understand those lessons, as lean as they
were.)

Myra: That’s true of everything you’ve told us. I went back and read the first
transcription that we had, and it covered some of the things we’ve learned in the last six
or eight sessions on Soul and Soul Body, and Ego and Entity. I was dumbfounded to read
it and discovered I understood it. I was re-reading it, I would like to add, because we are
preparing for our new issue of the Cosmic Connection, which is going to be on
Transition. I discovered two of the Tuesday night sessions with Silverthistle where he
covered the whole ball park. We could just lift his whole lecture for our Cosmic
Connection on that topic because he explained things so well. But I was wondering if
there was anything that you might like to suggest to us to be sure to include or not to do
for the new issue.

Sheariam: At that time there was much confusion in your minds as to what
continues in Transition, and you are not yet entirely prepared to understand what
you call the Astral Realm. But do be sure to emphasize that what you are and all
that you accomplish in any life span goes with you when the flesh is cast off. The
Door of Transition is no door of miracles. You are no different on the “other side”
of that door than you are on this side. You merely function in a different valence.

Owen: By “Valence”, Sheariam, do you mean in a different reality as without
physical restraint? (It is not a different reality, and it does have restraints, but not the
kind that you are used to in this valence. This material body does not pass easily
through walls. In that condition which you enter immediately upon which you call
“death”, you are the same, but you then can pass through certain things that would
be material obstacles on this side. Again, you are not equipped with sufficient
information for me to give you a comprehensive answer.)

Myra: There are some things that you couldn’t pass through as well as us?
(Correct, but they are bars, barriers of energy fields, which, of course, is all that
your walls are.)
Shira: Are the energy fields that same as creating your own reality on the other
side? (No.) I mean that if someone created a home around themselves, you couldn’t pass
through the walls of that home. Would that be “energy field”? (Yes.) I’m sorry for
interrupting you before. What were you going to say? (Virtually what you said.)

Owen: I’ve wondered about the term “valence”. Is there a synonym?
(“Condition.”. Since mostly, the “condition” is believed not to exist, you do not have
words to describe it.) (Laughter.) Do you think that we have enough information to go
ahead with this theme for our next Cosmic Connection on Transition? If you stick
closely to that which we have given, you have sufficient information for an issue of a
periodical. You cannot cover the subject adequately in its totality. But that is not
your intention.)

Peggy: You spoke about our not being any different than we are on this plane.
Aren’t we more of a spiritual and more knowledgeable person? (No. Walking through a
door does not miraculously change you from what you are. Growth is a process. It
continues.) But can we program ourselves now for another life, the next one? (You do
not know enough to do a good job. You are playing with toys too large for you to
handle.)
Myra: And yet everything that we learn helps us on the next level, doesn’t it?
(Yes.) Which is why we’re here studying this. (Yes. Were you to, to use your friend’s
words, “program your next life”, it would be as though a five-year-old decided to be
a doctor and granted himself a medical license.)

Shira: What if you are in possession of a blessing, which you realize to be a
blessing, and you realize that its potential can be either negative or positive, and you want
very much to secure the positive aspect of that blessing which you possess, and you think
that it is really a great part of your mission in developing your highest potential in this
particular life, and yet you feel that it’s in jeopardy, how can you secure a keeper of your
gates so that whatever comes through, you are sure will be honorable and full of good
light, that you feel you are a vehicle of goodness, and that those around you receive only
wonderful and enlightening and positive aspects of the information. How can you secure
this? How do you contact those from one realm to another when you know that they are
capable and are contacting you now? (Good will, love, joy, and absence of egotism. If
there is any self-gratification to be gained, then you must question. If you are willing
to relinquish all personal satisfactions, if you are willing to forego… I cannot seem
to find the proper word. If your activity is performed in total dedication to the
furtherance of joy, you cannot go wrong.)
So you must have complete faith. Do you know what I’m speaking about? (Yes, I
do.) And this is my promise then. I still don’t have absolute faith? Is it a fear that is inside
me? (It is self-doubt.) If I stop doubting, then this will happen, and the keeper of my gate
will be there. Is he just waiting for that? (Yes.) Is Porter that keeper of the gate? (For one
thing, you rush the clock. Patience. Certain areas of character are as yet incomplete.
If you entertain the faith that these are developing, are maturing, and at the right
time, in the right place, you will have a conviction that goes beyond faith. You will
know. And then there will be joy.)

Peggy: Sheariam, I’ve had a little problem, and I’ve been trying to figure out why,
because it started out to be so good. There has been a little complication coming between
myself, and I guess you could say, the people that run it. Is that to show me that I don’t
belong there, or there is something else better for me? Or is it just for me to have
something to climb over? (A situation is seldom simple. The drives are very complex.
There are personality conflicts which you are meant to learn how to sustain your
position without threatening another.) I’ve turned it over to God. (Then have faith. So
long as you worry, continually possess that thinking pattern, you do not exhibit
faith.) Well, it just came about in the last few days. (Then do not be concerned.
Exercise your faith.) OK. But I was puzzled as to why it has appeared. (You do not
need to know “the why”. All of you, you ask, “Why? Why? Why? Instead of
“How?”) Once I turned it over to God, I knew it was going to turn out OK.

Sheariam: Remember that as you walk in Cosmic Consciousness, you must be
Singular, which will cause you to be alienated. You do not seek alienation. You seek
to be individual. If you express joy in your individualism, that will single you out.
But it is the witness of your life that others will want to share in that experience of
such joy. And thus you encourage them to take the first step of Aspiration. If you
can have joy, then you give them hope that they, too, can be joyous.
And you, Little One, (addressing Shira) remember always, the future is not set
in concrete. What you see to be truth now, changes in a flash. Therefore you may
not have been wrong. Things change. If your ego suffers because you appear to have
been wrong, then you keep the gate closed. The word that I sought, and still seek, is
the word that says to you “Be not afraid – trust.” All right?
Shira: All right.
Myra: Living in trust is living with Relinquishment. (As John said, “Let not
your heart be troubled.” That is the secret to wholeness, to health, to peace, and to
security. All of the Truths are yours when you let not your heart be troubled.)

Sheariam: Shall we then have our closing meditation? Settle your bodies. Focus
your attention peacefully in your groin area. Allow the warmth of joy to begin to
flame as it did when you were a child in anticipation of some glorious event. Image
yourselves as children on the threshold of some great day when something
wonderful is about to happen. Feel that excitement. Let is rise to your middle. Feel
your heart beat faster. Feel your blood pouring faster through your veins, until your
throat cannot contain the song.
Then let that excitement pour forth through the crown of your head,
bringing peace and relaxation to your body. Your body is limp as an exhausted child
is at the end of the day. Yet deep in the psyche stir the memories of all the wonderful
events in a kaleidoscope, so that you do not distinguish details, yet behind your eyes
are the glorious colors, You feel alive and yet wanting rest.
All about you stands your group, your source people who support, who
comfort, who assist, who guide, who protect. They rejoice in the joy that pours forth
from you. You relax into the cradling arms of your source group. You know that
there you are safe. You may rest. You may be at peace. There is no one there to
prevent your joy, to limit the beating of your heart, to resist the extension of
yourself. There are only those who encourage, who love, who help, who heal. As you
relax further into that security, the temple healers come to place their hands upon
you, to soothe, to energize, to comfort, to heal. You simply relinquish everything
until you simply are.
Now, it is native to the human condition to be gregarious, and so you cannot
resist inviting others to join you. So you speak the names of those whom you love,
and those who are of like mind will respond. (Many names spoken softly.) Now, as
your loved ones respond to your invitation, the temple teachers gather with the
healers, and a great chorus of Hallelujahs carries this joyfulness around the globe.
While each receives healing according to his need, he also acts as an instrument to
spread abroad this healing thought, this focus of peace and harmony and abundance
for all.
Now bless this great company, Express your gratitude to the temple teachers
and healers, and most especially to your own source group. With joyful hearts, allow
your loved ones to depart. Return your consciousness to your daily affairs. I bid you
beloveds go in great joy and peace. Good night.

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